 This blog is a Bible study about communication and conflict. It is designed to help you read and meditate on Scripture as you consider how it applies to relationships and reconciliation. It is a PDF that you can download or print. Take your time with the Bible study and let us know what you think as you work through it!
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 Redeemed and forgiven, waiting for the not yet
Homesick for what is unseen In the cosmic garden all our hopes are met Light unending, trees always green Sojourners and exiles, looking for that day Groaning with the pains of anticipation Of release from the chains of decay Complete freedom in the new creation Chosen and sealed, striving in prayer To persevere in the fight against sin Grace sufficient beyond compare For death no longer has dominion Children and heirs, longing for our home Soon we will leave behind the curse Because the Son has overcome Then His glory will fill the universe Sanctified and loved, seeking our King The glorious city, our final dwelling place All things restored, creation will sing Seeing Him clearly, face to face  “...knowing the King is so important. Knowing him shows you that you can’t be the center of the world because he already is. That is a good thing.”
A black cover embossed with intricate gold foil. Glossy pages filled with detailed symbols and illustrations. The book is beautiful. Simply holding it and turning the pages is a delightful experience. But it is more than just a bibliophile’s paradise—it portrays truth through a quest, one that both children and adults will enjoy. Emblems of the Infinite King (written by J. Ryan Lister and illustrated by Anthony Benedetto) takes kids on a journey through the Bible’s narrative. The author and illustrator combine beauty and truth as they teach key aspects of biblical doctrine — including the Trinity, mankind, sin, salvation, and the church. The concepts are explained with simple vocabulary and thoughtful analogies that young readers can understand. I found myself flipping back and forth through the pages to discover how the intricate symbols on each page illustrate the concept being taught. The one that stood out to me was the illustration for “The End of All Things”. It feels as though you could step into the scene itself — every detail draws the reader further into the story and its meaning. Emblems is marketed for ages 8-13, but it is a quest that we all need to read. It reminds us of who we are and who God is. This book rewards repeated reading — offering something new to notice each time its pages are opened.  It was the first day of school for me. I walked into school and the principal told me I had to teach History and Math (instead of Spanish). At the same time. In the weight room. To a group of cats.
This is just one example of the dreams I have during the last week of summer vacation each year. So what do we do about dreams? Are they messages sent from “beyond?” Should we ponder the symbolism of the orange cat learning Math from a Spanish teacher while sitting on the bench press? Are we morally responsible for what we dream about? These are important questions to consider. While we should not make too much of our dreams by analyzing every element in them, we shouldn’t completely ignore them. A first step to considering dreams can be to keep a log of your dreams. It’s not necessary to record all details, simply record the basic ideas (as much as you can remember). Along with the general content of the dream, note what you were doing the evening before. What did you eat? What were you watching/reading/listening to before bed? What were you feeling (anxious, fearful, happy, nervous)? Has anything changed in your routine or circumstances? As you keep record of these details, you may notice recurring patterns or connections. It is important to carefully and prayerfully consider what you may be watching, reading, discussing, or listening to. Proverbs 4:23 reminds us that our hearts are the source of life. This isn’t referring to the organ pumping in our chest, but our inner man. Our hearts are where our thoughts, feelings, deepest desires, and motivations are formed. What we allow to come into our minds will affect what is in our hearts. And then what is in our heart may affect how our minds work while sleeping. For example, there were a few months when I was having very dark, violent dreams. I had been watching a particular TV show and because I had been allowing that content into my thoughts while I was awake, my mind then ruminated on those concepts while asleep. After I stopped watching that show, those dreams gradually subsided. When we see recurring patterns, we should seriously take a look at our habits, thoughts, and wishes. As it says in Psalm 139:23-24, we can prayerfully consider if there is anything we need to change. If our dreams are the outflow of inappropriate content or sinful desires we have been indulging in while awake, we are responsible to turn away and repent. For many people, it can be helpful to eliminate any screen time before bed - including phones and TV. Replacing those habits with listening to or reading Scripture can help settle our mind and heart. Psalm 119 reminds us that our delight is in his Word. Philippians 4:8 offers a list of things that we can think about. As we consider what is true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and praiseworthy, our thoughts will be focused on God. But we must also be cautious. Dreams are not always the product of a sinful habit that needs to change. We should not be fearful of every dream and spend hours in introspection and dream analysis. A particular food may affect our bodies in a way that disturbs our sleep. Getting an adequate amount of exercise or physical activity during the day can promote sound sleep. Being overtired can also affect our state of mind while sleeping. If we are constantly running from one activity to the next, or overwhelmed with life’s circumstances, we will have troubled sleep. It is reassuring to know that we don’t have to turn to a psychoanalyst or take a class on dream interpretation. If our sleep and our dreams are not restful, we can turn to Scripture, prayer, and biblical meditation to give us clarity. It also may be helpful to talk with a trusted friend, a godly mentor, or a biblical counselor. They may be able to offer insight and practical suggestions. So back to those intelligent, body-building cats….these dreams are a reflection of the anxieties that I experience each year. Even after 30 years of teaching, I become anxious about the unknown. I wonder what my students will be like or what new changes the administration has in store. When I wake up from another mind-boggling teaching scenario, I remind myself that no matter who my students are, or what new procedures I will encounter, God is sovereign and has brought these people and circumstances into my life for a reason. I thank God for the strength and wisdom he will give me to face whatever happens. And then I make my family laugh by telling them about my latest crazy dream.  Industrious. Kind. Generous. Skilled. Wise. Thrifty. Intelligent. She “does it all”. We know her well. She is the so-called Proverbs 31 woman. We spend our days trying to measure up. Then we feel inadequate because we know we are far from being the noble, virtuous, praiseworthy woman described in Proverbs 31:10-31. But this chapter wasn’t written to give us a checklist for how the godly woman should spend her days. Rather, it is a lens that we can hold up to understand how a woman can reflect the character of God. These examples describe a woman who is married with children, but that does not mean those who are single, widowed, or without children should skip over these descriptions. All women (and men) can use these examples to consider what wise living looks like in their lives. As the heading to Proverbs 31 states, this section was written for a king. His mother was instructing him on how he should view his wife. He should see her as a precious treasure to be valued. A wise wife is someone who is strong and capable. She is a blessing to him, and he treats her accordingly. The husband and wife work together mutually. Their marriage, along with their individual reputations flourish. If we think about the culture of the time, it is quite amazing that these verses praise a woman so highly. For those who claim that the Bible is demeaning to women, we can point them to Proverbs 31 to show them that God values women. The woman shows her worth by working hard. She is busy and productive for the benefit of others. Her strength is in her perseverance and willingness to do whatever is needed to provide for her household. She is confident, pro-active, and savvy. While she uses her time and skills to provide for her household, she also shows compassion for the needy and vulnerable. She sees when others are hurting or lacking, and reaches out to help them. We can apply these principles by prayerfully considering how we can use the skills God has given us to care for our family and others. This may look a little different for each woman, and it may change as the seasons of life change. It may mean that we stay at home to care for children, or it may involve working full-time to contribute to the finances. It could mean that we are active in one or several ministries at church. Or it may mean that we encourage others through writing cards or praying together. But it does not mean that we have to do all of these things. We should craft our days based on the skills and passion God has given us. Each of us will have different circles of influence and varying levels of energy, time, and resources to use. Another aspect of godly living seen in the life of the wise woman is her speech. She speaks with kindness, grace, and truth. She is attentive to each person in her circle of influence and uses her words to build up, encourage, and strengthen them. Her words are sincere and grounded in God’s truth, not masked in flattery and deception. Everything we do and say teaches others. As the saying goes, “More is caught than is taught.” When the washer is broken, or supper is burnt, how do we respond? Do we get angry and frustrated? If our children say they have been bullied, how do we advise them? When we are at home, at the grocery store, at a soccer game, or at work, people are watching us. Each moment is a teachable moment, and everyone around us is learning from us. Do our actions and words adorn the gospel? And finally, for the noble, virtuous woman, her motivation is the fear of Yahweh. Her praise comes not from how she is dressed, her flawless complexion, or her charming personality. Her focus is on eternal, not external, beauty. She is clothed with elegance that radiates God’s love. Those who praise her know Who she serves. The Proverbs 31 woman understands that circumstances ebb and flow. When bad days (or months or years) come, she still does what she can with what she has. She is not tossed about by the waves of misfortune because she is anchored in God’s word. She knows that God has written her story and is in control. The picture presented in Proverbs 31 gives us an idea of the ways a godly woman can use her skills and interests to care for the people around her. But (and this bears repeating), we don’t have to try to match the specific examples in the chapter. We need to prayerfully consider how God wants us to reflect these characteristics. I have friends who do quilting, or gardening, or baking. I don’t do well at those, nor do I enjoy them. I have friends who work part- time, or full-time, or who stay at home. Some homeschool their children, some have children that attend private, Christian school, and others send their children to public school. They all raise their children in the nurture of the Lord. I know ladies who struggle with chronic health conditions who serve in quiet, unseen ways. Our lives all look very different, but we are all using what God has given us to worship Him and serve others. The good news is that we don’t have to do all the things the Proverbs 31 woman does. The bad news is that we can’t even begin to achieve even one of them on our own. Even our best of intentions are tainted with impure motives. But the good news is that God knew we wouldn’t be able to. He made a way for us.The only way we are able to walk in wisdom and the fear of God is to turn to Jesus and repent. Then we continue looking to him for strength, discernment, and comfort as we live each day.  Sin often feels stronger than we are. We fight the same temptations, make the same promises to do better, and wonder if lasting change is really possible. The good news is that God has not left His children to battle sin alone.
Unlike most posts on this site, this blog isn't meant to be read from beginning to end in just a few minutes. Instead, think of it as a guided Bible study. Set aside some uninterrupted time. Open your Bible, grab a notebook, and ask the Holy Spirit to help you understand and apply His Word. The questions are not intended to give you all the answers but to help you meditate on the Scriptures and see God's truth for yourself. This study isn't about finding a secret formula for victory. It's about seeing what God has already provided through Christ and learning to depend on Him each day. As you work through these passages, ask God to renew your mind and deepen your confidence in His promises. Read each verse below out loud 2-3 times. Writing them out can be helpful, also. After reading each passage, summarize it in your own words. Then write what it teaches about God's provision for overcoming sin. There are some questions provided below to guide your thought process. What repeated words or ideas do you notice? What do these verses teach about the gospel's role in overcoming sin? What attributes of God are revealed? What has God provided that enables believers to fight sin? What responsibilities does God call us to fulfill? According to these passages, what should we do when we stumble? How do we persevere? Our New Identity
Finally, write out a prayer based on what you have learned from this study. Praise God for who he is and thank him for what he has done. Confess any sin. Commit to repentance by identifying not only what you will "put off," but also what you will "put on" instead. Also consider what specific steps will help you walk in obedience this week. Choose one or two verses to memorize this week. Write them on index cards, save them as your phone wallpaper, or place them where you'll see them often. Ask God to bring them to mind when you are tempted. If you find yourself trapped in a pattern of persistent sin and need help, you don't have to struggle alone. Reach out to a mature believer in your local church, or if we can serve you, email [email protected] to learn more about biblical counseling.  “We love well when we affirm and encourage a person’s identity in Christ, pointing out where we see the Spirit at work. We love well when we bring consolation, hope, and help in the midst of a friend’s affliction. We love well when we bring admonition to highlight and correct sin.”
Mike Emlet, Saints, Sufferers and Sinners: Loving Others as God Loves Us Your friend just learned that her husband has received a devastating diagnosis. A teen in your church shares that she is struggling with friendships at school. Your neighbor, a single mom, was laid off from her job. A woman in your small group quietly admits she is battling anxiety and depression. How do you help? What biblical comfort and wisdom can you offer? Life is rarely simple, and there isn’t a book in the Bible that outlines a neat, step-by-step formula for walking alongside those who are suffering. However, Scripture does give us wisdom and principles for caring well for others. The nuanced descriptions and practical examples Emlet provides help bridge the gap between biblical truth and real life, boots-on-the-ground, messy, complicated situations. In his book Saints, Sufferers, and Sinners, Mike Emlet defines the biblical categories of saints, sufferers, and sinners—and explains how they shape the way we help one another grow in Christlikeness. As I read, I often found myself stopping to reread sections—not because they were unclear, but because they were uncomfortably familiar. The principles and examples applied directly to my own experiences, both past trials and present difficulties. I was also reminded of times when I failed to help someone well. Like Job’s so-called friends, I didn’t always take the time to truly listen before offering what I thought might be a quick fix. Yet even as he gently corrects our tendency toward “quick fixes,” Emlet offers hope to those of us who have, at times, been miserable comforters. He reminds us that God is patient with His people and that He graciously works even through our weaknesses. In this way, the book compassionately and constructively reflects Paul’s instruction in 1 Thessalonians 5:14: “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.” Emlet acknowledges that believers are all of these—saints, sufferers, and sinners—at the same time. Throughout the book, he consistently points us back to Christ and the gospel. He urges us to examine our own hearts as we minister to others. Drawing from both the Old and New Testaments, Emlet prompts us to remember our identity as saints, persevere with hope in suffering, and renew our minds as we confront sin in our own lives. Chapter 6, Ministry Priorities for Loving Saints, was one I especially needed to read. Emlet reminds us to actively look for evidence of God’s grace at work in others. It is often far easier to spot flaws in someone else—while remaining blind to similar flaws in ourselves. Instead, he urges us to be eager to point out where a person’s character reflects Christlikeness. While there are appropriate times to confront sin, our first instinct should be to go on a “grace hunt” rather than an “idol hunt.” At the end of the book, Emlet lifts our eyes to our certain hope. One day, the categories of sufferers and sinners will no longer exist. The promise of our future in the new heavens and the new earth is so sure that it can be considered a fait accompli—already done. Until then, we walk together through the “already, not yet” of the Christian life, with our minds and hearts set firmly on Christ. Beloved, we are now children of God, and what we will be has not yet been revealed. We know that when Christ appears, we will be like Him, for we will see Him as He is. And everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as Christ is pure. 1 John 3:2-3  Centuries ago, Juan Ponce de León set out in search of a fountain that could restore youth. Whether legend or history, the story stuck because it captured something we still search for today. We see this longing in movies like Tuck Everlasting and The Age of Adaline. And in our everyday lives, the quest for youthfulness hasn’t stopped. The anti-aging industry promises to smooth, erase, and reverse the evidence of time. What is it about aging that we’re so desperate to escape? The answer to this dilemma comes from Genesis 1. Our discomfort with aging reflects the way God originally designed us to live. God fashioned the first image-bearers, blessed them, and placed them in the garden of Eden (Genesis 1:26-27). As they fulfilled the command to be fruitful and multiply, the earth would be filled with God’s image-bearers who would glorify him. They had access to many trees in the garden, including the tree of life. This tree was a symbol of God’s abundant provision and life-giving power. They would flourish and continue to experience divine blessing and unending life. Everything was very good (Genesis 1:31). This is how things were meant to be. Sickness and death did not exist. But this perfect paradise did not last long. Adam and Eve decided that what God had given them wasn’t enough. They wanted more and took what was forbidden. In exchange, they lost what they needed most. They no longer experienced intimacy with God or each other. They hid in shame and pointed fingers in blame. A moment of sweet satisfaction led to perpetual pain. God showed mercy. Rather than allow his image-bearers to endure unending lives with pain and suffering, he blocked access to the tree of life. Their bodies and minds would decay. Death would overshadow their lives. Because their sin affected all of us, we are all subjected to the curse of death (Romans 5:12). So we spend our lives searching for ways to hide the evidence of the curse. We resist aging because we were created to live forever in unbroken intimacy with God. We won’t find eternal youth from a fountain. Buying another cream or having surgery won’t erase the echoes of the rebellion in the garden. We can’t reverse the curse. But someone did. O death, where is your victory? In Christ, we have victory over sin and death. He willingly suffered undeserved punishment and gave his life so that we could have eternal life. When we trust in Him, we are once again restored to a relationship with our creator. We still live in the shadow of the curse, though. Joints grow stiff. Wrinkles and gray hair appear. (Ecclesiastes 12:1-5). But as we struggle with the effects of sin, they remind us that there is something better to come. As believers, we will once again dwell in a paradise on earth. Sickness, death, tears, and pain will be gone. We don’t need to look for an imaginary fountain of youth, because soon we will eat from the tree of life (Revelation 22:1-2). Our longing to stay young points us to the life we were created to have in Christ. Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, bright as crystal, flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb through the middle of the street of the city; also, on either side of the river, the tree of life with its twelve kinds of fruit, yielding its fruit each month. The leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations. No longer will there be anything accursed, but the throne of God and of the Lamb will be in it, and his servants will worship him. They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads.  Don’t buy me flowers, chocolate, or jewelry. Just take me to Barnes & Noble or hand me an Amazon gift card. Sound familiar?
If you’re like me, you may have a serious condition that requires regular infusions of reading. The only problem is that books are not always cheap. So how do we keep up with our reading habits without breaking the bank? Here are some ways I’ve been able to consume large amounts of words without going bankrupt. As always, use discernment when stocking up on your book supplements. Tim Challies’ Kindle Deals You can sign up (for free) to receive his daily email, which includes Kindle book deals (both Christian and general market). His newsletter also includes links to various blogs that may be of interest to Christians—because we also need to keep up with micro-doses of reading encouragement. BookBub With BookBub, you can choose your preferred genres and receive a daily email featuring ebooks on sale in those categories. It’s an easy way to discover discounted books without doing the searching yourself. Libby If you have a library card, Libby is an excellent way to stay nourished with books. You can borrow ebooks and audiobooks for free through the app and read/listen directly on your device. Spotify Premium Spotify Premium now includes a selection of audiobooks. It’s a great way to squeeze in an extra reading workout session without adding another subscription. Kindle Unlimited Instead of subscribing every month, keep a running list of books available on Kindle Unlimited. Then, when you’re ready, subscribe for one month. You can cancel immediately so it doesn’t auto-renew, and focus on reading only from your curated list during that time. Amazon Prime Digital Credits If you use Amazon Prime, you can sometimes choose slower shipping in exchange for digital credits—which can then be used toward Kindle books. It’s a simple way to turn patience into reading material. Start a Library at Your Church Church libraries can be an amazing resource, especially when they’re built intentionally. Consider donating books or organizing a small lending library so your community can share good reads. Book Swaps with Friends Get together with a few friends, decide on books you all want to read, and each buy one. Then trade them around. It’s an easy way to multiply your reading list without multiplying your spending. With a little creativity, a few subscriptions, and some strategic borrowing, you can keep your book habit well-fed without financial regret. Happy reading! See also: Avoiding Readers Remorse When Stories Don’t Match Real Life  Life can be filled with seasons of joy, but it also brings struggles, questions, disappointments, and suffering. Biblical counseling is an opportunity to meet together, study God's Word, and seek His wisdom for the challenges you are facing.
What Is Biblical Counseling? Biblical counseling is a one on one discipleship-centered ministry that applies the truths of Scripture to the real struggles of life. Rather than relying on secular psychology or traditional clinical therapy models, biblical counseling seeks lasting heart change through God's Word, the gospel of Jesus Christ, and the work of the Holy Spirit. Because of this approach, biblical counseling may differ significantly from secular counseling, mental health treatment, or clinical therapy techniques. Biblical counseling is also different from “Christian counseling” that incorporates psychological theories alongside Scripture. Counselors can address a variety of issues including suffering, coping with long-term illness, anxiety, additions, fear, relationship issues, grief, abuse, and much more. Certification and Accountability The Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC) is an international organization dedicated to training and certifying counselors who are committed to the sufficiency of Scripture for helping people navigate the challenges of life. Certification requires extensive training, examinations, supervised counseling experience, and agreement with established doctrinal and ethical standards. Counselors also participate in ongoing continuing education to maintain their certification. ACBC-certified counselors seek to provide compassionate, Christ-centered care that is firmly grounded in God's Word while serving under the oversight of a local church. What You Can Expect ACBC counselors are committed to:
Your Commitment Biblical counseling is most effective when it is approached as an active discipleship relationship. As a counselee, you will be encouraged to:
Growth rarely happens overnight. As we faithfully apply God's Word day by day, He continues His work of transforming us into the likeness of Christ. Our Foundation The goal of biblical counseling is not simply to solve problems, but to help people know Christ more deeply and faithfully follow Him in every circumstance. Lasting hope is found not in our own strength, but in the sufficient wisdom of God's Word and the transforming grace of Jesus Christ. "All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness." — 2 Timothy 3:16–17 If you would like more information about biblical counseling, you can email [email protected] or you can search for an ACBC counselor at this link: https://biblicalcounseling.com/find-a-counselor/. |
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